Feature: How To Employ Subway Etiquette

May 16, 2011 By Joanna Zwickel 2 Comments

*Orginally published November 4, 2010*

Rule number 1: Let people get off the train before you push your way on. Collisions are fun in sports, the movies and even on the bumper cars. Other than that, they hurt.

Rule number 2: Don’t let your child take up three seats.  Yes, little Cindy is adorable hopping from seat to seat singing.  Absolutely precious.  That’s why I’m sorry that I’m going to have to sit on her.

Rule number 3: Move to the center of the car instead of cramming together on top of the door. I know it’s a crazy idea, but you might not be sexually harassed from all sides if you were willing to take a few steps into the middle of the car.  As cool as it might be to feel like clowns crammed into a tiny car, suffocation is not a fun way to die.

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Oh WOAH Is Me

February 8, 2011 By Joanna Zwickel Leave a Comment

At Zebulon Café, the air is filled with a deep, raspy voice, full of emotion. The Woes’ energy and passion seeps out of the music and fills the bar.   The musicians are Osei Essed, singer, composer, guitarist, and banjo player, Kevin Russell on Clarinet, Aaron Shafer-Haiss the drummer, Andrew Platt the bass guitarist, Phil Sterk playing pedal steel, Will Orzo on french horn, Mike Irwin on the trumpet, and Bob Pycior on the electric violin. Their music has been called post-apocalyptic traditional music, blues, folk, and good old American music, but when asked what genre they would classify it as, they merely say, “We are waiting for someone else to tell us what we play.”

The Woes usually feature 6 to 7 people at a performance, but they have a rotating cast of roughly 30 performers.  Most of The Woes play in other bands as well, but they support each other’s efforts.  I found it amazing that they could sound so cohesive on stage not knowing who they will be playing with, or what instruments will be present at a gig.  Even at rehearsals, they never know if they are rehearsing with the band members they will actually be performing with.  Having a slight background in music myself, I’ve always found it important to rehearse with the people I would be performing with to make sure we were in sync.  But while I would expect chaos to come out of such unpredictable preparation, The Woes are perfectly timed, perfectly blended, and could not fit together better.   The band leader, Osei says that sometimes they joke around during rehearsals just to make sure they can play through distractions.

The Woes enjoy spending time with each other outside of their music as well.  In fact, the band’s name – - “The Woes” – - was chosen while its members were drinking and discussing their troubles.  They all joke around about spending a lot of time together in “The Van. “ Osei says that they spend 50% of their time in the van, 30% sleeping on the floor, 15% lugging their instruments onto the stage, and 5% actually playing.

Zebulon Café, where I saw the band perform, is a dingy little bar in Williamsburg, Brooklyn full of live music enthusiasts.  Along with bars, The Woes also play in venues ranging from people’s apartments to Bowery Ballroom to the street.  Not only can they easily accommodate a variety of performers, but they can also acclimate their performances to an extreme range of venues.  They come prepared for everything and anything.  When asked what their ideal performance space would be, they say Radio City during the Christmas Spectacular, or The Mirage in Las Vegas.

The Woes say that their ideal reaction to their music is when people get up and dance; they love an interactive audience.  However, when asked if they meet a lot of women through their music, Aaron Shafer-Haiss said, “See you later” and then sped away.

The Woes are currently working on a double live album and a studio LP that will be released by the end of 2011.  They currently have four records out.  Records are so uncommon today that I couldn’t help asking why they released their music on records when so few people have record players anymore.  They responded that “a record is a much more beautiful artifact than a CD.”  For those without a record player, their music is also available on iTunes.  But I wouldn’t recommend hearing The Woes for the first time on a record or iTunes; they are far more exciting to listen to in person.  Their upcoming performances are March 3rd at Higher Ground in Burlington, VT, March 4th at Oak & The Axe in Biddeford, ME, and March 17th at Rockshop in Brooklyn.

The Woes are a fantastic live band.  While they play, the audience cheers them on and requests encores.  Men grab their dates and start dancing.  The band works together well, but more importantly they seem at home on stage.  It’s like watching a bunch of friends blowing off steam after a long day at work.  And as you sip your drink, or spin around the dance floor, all of your worries get lost in that bluesy, folksy, post-apocalyptic, good old American music that no one’s found a way to describe yet.

Raw Radio Online: Saying Things You Wish Your Mother Wouldn’t Hear

January 6, 2011 By Joanna Zwickel 1 Comment


Mike “Ragu” Ragusa is the creator of Raw Radio Online, an online radio show that prides itself on testing the limits of freedom of speech. The show’s humor is politically incorrect, sexually explicit, rich with profanity, and generally aimed at making the audience think twice about whether it’s okay to laugh. However, after the first five minutes the shock wears off just enough that you can sit back and enjoy the show.

The radio show airs every Wednesday at 10 pm, and is available on their website rawradioonline.com and as an itunes podcast. Each episode is roughly an hour long and is broadcast from their studio in New Jersey. The show has only been up and running for eight months, but has already developed reoccurring segments. For example, Ragusa does a weekly rant on the things that piss him off.

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Top 10 New Years Resolutions for 2011

December 27, 2010 By Joanna Zwickel 1 Comment

Top 10 New Years Resolutions for 2011

1. I will never eat again

2. In order to maintain a proper balance, I will exercise on the left side of my body and eat on the right side of my body.

3. I will quit smoking on weekends, mornings, and evenings, but will continue smoking from 9-5 on work days.

4. I will not drink heavily, but if I do, I will only drive the google car.

5. I will make every reasonable effort to avoid stress at work unless I am asked to leave, in which case I will make every reasonable effort to throw a fit.

6. I will spend more time with my family, except when my in-laws arrive.

7. In an effort to be more environmentally conscious, I will not throw litter out the window of my SUV.

8. I will spend less money on non-essentials other than my bi-weekly body wax treatments.

9. In an effort to wean myself off of watching excessive amounts of TV I will play more video games.

10. I will no longer date people who own night vision goggles.

[caption id="attachment_7819" align="aligncenter" width="452" caption="image taken from newyearseve.ws"][/caption]

Top 10 New Years Resolutions for 2011

The Sharp Lads Prepare For World Domination

December 18, 2010 By Joanna Zwickel 1 Comment

Those worried about preserving their hearing at concerts are going to want to take out the ear plugs. The Sharp Lads, an up and coming punk rock band, are releasing a CD in February. The band has four members: Tim Ireland on drums, Rich Tenor on guitar and vocals, Kurt Wahlstrom on bass, guitar, and vocals, and David Tierney on guitar and lead vocals. While David Tierney writes most of the lyrics, the band usually composes their music collaboratively.

The band has only been together for six months, so the musicians still work other jobs on the side. They do photography, advertising, video art, and pharmaceuticals, but they are determined to make a career out of their music. “Our immediate goal,” says David Tierney, “is world domination.” They want to travel and play their music all over the world. When asked where they would most want to play, they all agreed on The Paradiso in Amsterdam.

For now, the band plays most of its gigs around New York City: Matchless, Lit Lounge, Cake Shop, Public Assembly, and Cameo Gallery. Their most popular song/biggest crowd pleaser is “Drugs, Booze and Your Little Sister.” The band members are full of energy, even without their instruments. The Sharp Lads insisted that it was very important to them to get everyone in the room dancing. If anyone at their concerts is standing in a corner with arms crossed, they aren’t doing their jobs right. They try to have a lot of fun on stage, and believe that the more they enjoy themselves, the more likely it is that the audience will have a great time.

Some of the band’s inspirations include Richard Hell, The Dictators, The Real Kids, The Buzzcocks, Battles, the Subhumans, and assorted hip hop, Jamaican, and jazz music. Due to their eclectic taste in music, the band has a very distinct sound that makes even the worst dancers want to get up and start moving.

When asked if they had any die-hard fans or stalkers yet, Tim Ireland chimed in that they had a girl at one of their concerts take off her boots and put them on the bar. When the rest of the band and I agreed that this was a little strange, he admitted sheepishly, “Yeah…I date her now.”

In February, after The Sharp Lads’ CD has been released, it can be found on their website www.thesharplads.com. You can also check out their music now at www.myspace.com/thesharplads or keep updated on their upcoming performances at www.facebook.com/thesharplads. They may just be getting started, but their determination to spread their music worldwide cannot be contained much longer.

Sushi Pizza: A More Perfect Union

December 13, 2010 By Joanna Zwickel Leave a Comment

[caption id="attachment_7417" align="aligncenter" width="400" caption="image from edo-sushi.com"][/caption]
By some miracle of fate I found it. I was sitting in a little Japanese restaurant on the Upper West Side called Kitaro, when I noticed what I first assumed was a typo on the menu. However, upon further investigation, I discovered that by a stroke of genius, two super powers had joined together to form an almighty concoction: sushi pizza.

When the meal arrived, I found a thin layer of bread topped with spicy tuna, avocado, and a variety of sauces, sliced evenly in a circle to resemble a pizza. This creative masterpiece sparked my curiosity. Sushi pizza is rumored to have been invented by a chef at a Japanese restaurant called Atami Sushi, in Montreal, Quebec in 1992. It is now very popular in Montreal and Toronto, and has very recently traveled to major cities in the Northeastern United States.

There are many ways to make the dish, but most of them involve a thin layer of bread or a slightly crispy, yet chewy, fried rice patty as the base. It is often topped with a layer of sliced tuna or salmon, avocado, crab meat, a drizzle of blended mayonnaise, and wasabi powder. It is always served in wedges made to resemble an actual pizza. This mouthwatering dish is not only delicious, but also low calorie. Depending on the way it is made, there are roughly 290 calories in an entire 6 slice pizza.

While the dish is still hard to find, it is offered at Kitaro located on Amsterdam Avenue between 84th and 85th Streets, Planet Sushi located on Amsterdam Avenue and 78th Street, and at Tsuki located on 1st Avenue between 74th and 75th Streets.

New York is one of the few cities in the U.S. offering sushi pizza. It is one of the most inventive and delicious meals I’ve had in quite awhile. By all means, go and try some so that the trend will continue to spread. You won’t regret it.

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New York’s Christmas Windows

December 7, 2010 By Joanna Zwickel 3 Comments
[caption id="attachment_7245" align="aligncenter" width="452" caption="Photo taken by Melanie Block"][/caption]

The top Christmas window displays in Manhattan can be found at Macy’s, Saks Fifth Avenue, Bloomingdales, Lord and Taylor, Barneys, and Bergdorf Goodman. While many of the windows this year are festive and creative, Macy’s Herald Square has the best display by far.

The stories accompanying the Macy’s window displays have been steadily declining for the past few years, lacking the magic, depth, intrigue, and cohesiveness that I remembered from years past. But this year’s story is both well written and inspirational. The overriding message is the importance of believing against all odds, which is accentuated by an enormous display of lights forming the word “Believe” on the side of the building. The visual displays are also phenomenal. Each window features moving figurines telling the story, and, the backgrounds and sets change as the story progresses. At each window, a voice over of the story is read aloud via loud speakers for younger children who don’t know how to read the words yet. Macy’s, located at 6th Avenue and 34th Street, has the best story, the best message, and the best display of any of the windows this year.

Saks Fifth Avenue, located on 5th Avenue and 50th Street, has the least impressive windows this year. While Macy’s chose to encourage it’s viewers to believe against all odds, Saks took the opposite approach and chose the theme of bursting a bubble. Their displays feature mannequins in fancy dresses in the midst of plastic bubbles and one window had a sign reading “Burst a Bubble.” Bursting a bubble usually refers to destroying a fantasy. While Macy’s chose to inspire it’s audience to believe against all odds, the title of Saks theme refers to destroying a fantasy. This message could not be less inspiring, and the mannequins covered in bubbles lacks any semblance of holiday magic.

Bloomingdales, located on Lexington and 59th Street, features TVs with moving images of snow falling on houses, woods, Christmas trees, and falling through a stormy sky. In the background of one window is a sign reading “Happy, Merry, Peace, Love.” This display is more Christmasy than most of the others, but the TV screens are far less fun to watch than the moving puppets telling a story. While the windows certainly get you in the mood for the holidays, I have to give them a thumbs down for creativity.

Lord and Taylor, located at 5th Avenue and 39th Street, was far more creative. The store wrote out what people from all over the country said they liked most about Christmas and where in the country each person was from. The windows had moving displays bringing to life each person’s favorite thing about Christmas. This was my second favorite set of windows because it featured an interesting visual display, a clear theme, and plenty of holiday spirit.

Barneys, located on Madison Avenue and 61st Street, features innovators/revolutionaries in the food industry. The windows display replicas of influential chefs such as Julia Child (seen floating in a pot), Martha Stewart, Rachel Ray, Paula Deen, and many more. A sign in one of the windows reads “Have A Foodie Holiday.” There is also a window with an expresso theme, featuring an expresso machine and hundreds of tiny expresso cups. For a store that carries a lot of very small sizes, encouraging excessive eating seems like the wrong message to bring the store business.

And finally Bergdorf Goodman, located on 5th Avenue and 58th Street, focuses on travel/exploration. The windows showcase trains, planes, cars, buggies, telescopes, hot air balloons, maps, etc. While this theme is more creative and inspirational than Barneys, it seems to have very little to do with the holidays.

It’s wonderful to be in New York around the holidays. The light posts are wrapped in Christmas lights, windows glow with candles and menorahs, crowds gather in Rockefeller Center to watch the ice skaters and gaze up at the tree, but the Christmas windows have a uniquely New York City feeling to them. I suggest that you visit them all, but if you don’t have the time, start with Macy’s and Lord and Taylor.

Feature: Hilarity On Wheels

November 29, 2010 By Joanna Zwickel Leave a Comment
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onk4JRXInAI[/youtube]

David Birnbaum is a standup comedian who grew up in NYC.  Of course standup is a relative term, because he got into a car accident at age 19 and is confined to a wheelchair.  Birnbaum is a very talented comedian with a great sense of humor about his disability.  He jokes that he’s a disabled people who likes to overcome challenges.  Recently he completed his first marathon: 24 straight hours of Star Trek.

Birnbaum has been performing standup comedy regularly at NY comedy clubs since 2004.  He performs at NYC’s Carolines, Broadway Comedy, The Comic Strip, Gotham and Laugh Lounge.  He also writes humorous essays, which have been published in places like The New York Times Magazine, The Village Voice, The New York Press, and in a college textbook Patterns of Essay Writing which also included essays by David Sedaris and Steve Martin.

As if being a successful standup comedian and comedy writer weren’t enough, David also has worked for NYU Biofeedback Labs, Bell Laboratories Artificial Intelligence Research, AT&T Online Learning, Diversity Inc.com.  He is currently Vice President and leads the corporate training department at the nation’s largest real estate company.

While David is a situp comedian, his wonderful positivity, sense of humor about his disability and determination to live life to the fullest regardless of the challenges he faces makes him truly inspiring.  Birnbaum’s upcoming performances are listed on his website: www.davidcomedy.com and he is well worth seeing in person.  The next time that you let some seemingly monumental problem hold you back from doing what you want to do, think of David refusing to let anything take the smile off his face.

Christine Lavin: An Unexpected Smash

November 13, 2010 By Joanna Zwickel Leave a Comment
[caption id="attachment_6349" align="aligncenter" width="452" caption="Photo from www.uureading.com"][/caption]

At first, I was dubious of the round cheeked woman wearing a sweater, guitar hung over her shoulder, as she climbed up onto the stage at Birdland Jazz club.  She didn’t resemble the chicly dressed, poised, graceful musicians I was used to.  Instead she reminded me of an aunt who had decided to take up a new hobby.  My skepticism evaporated almost immediately when she began to sing. Christine Lavin is easily one of the most humorous, opinionated and genuine musicians I’ve ever heard perform.

It is a real shame that while she has won many awards, she is not very well known.  Christine Lavin is a singer/ songwriter/ guitarist/ recording artist living in New York.  She has recorded 20 solo albums, and has produced 9 compilation CDs showcasing the musicians whose work she loves.  She has also recorded with other female folk artists under the name “Four Bitchin’ Babes.” As if that weren’t enough, Lavin writes for various publications such as The Washington Post, The St. Petersburg Times, The Performing Songwriter, and Delta “Sky” Magazine.  Two of her more famous songs are titled “Sensitive New Age Guys” and “Bald Headed Men.” Several of Lavin’s songs have been featured in Off-Broadway musicals, and are the basis for a new musical scheduled to premiere in Los Angeles.

Lavin was working at Caffe Lena in Saratoga, New York, when Dave Van Ronk convinced her to make a career out of her music and move to New York City.  She took his advice, and took guitar lessons from him as well.  She has lived in NYC ever since.

Christine’s eccentric lyrics are not the only thing quirky about her.  She hosts knitting circles backstage prior to every show, and often ends a concert by twirling a glow-in-the-dark baton with the house lights turned off as she leaves the stage.  She worked on a book entitled Remember Me When I’m Gone, in which she and other performers such as Larry King and Oprah Winfrey wrote their own obituaries. She also posed nude as Miss January for a “Nude Folk” calendar in 2005, a project designed to promote folk music in North America, with some of the profits going to the North American Folk and Dance Alliance.

Lavin also wrote what is being called “the longest song title in music history.” It’s 123 words long and is called: “Regretting What I Said to You When You Called Me 11:00 on a Friday Morning to Tell Me that at 1:00 Friday Afternoon You’re Gonna Leave Your Office, Go Downstairs, Hail a Cab to Go Out to the Airport to Catch a Plane to Go Skiing In the Alps for Two Weeks, Not that I Wanted to Go With You, I Wasn’t Able to Leave Town, I’m Not a Very Good Skier, I Couldn’t Expect You to Pay My Way, But After Going Out With You for Three Years, I DON’T Like Surprises!!” And it’s subtitled “’A Musical Apology’ In this song I attempt to take back everything I said while standing in a phone booth on the corner of 49th and 3rd.”

Christine Lavin is clever, creative, and never fails to top your expectations.  I suggest you hear her perform live, but if not at least buy her CD.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_6XMqcEqiI&feature=player_embedded#![/youtube]

New York City Live!: A Variety Show Comeback

November 7, 2010 By Joanna Zwickel Leave a Comment

Sick of all the bickering on reality TV? Well, here’s a show to save the day, New York City Live!, a brand new Variety show that will be aired once a month via a LIVE webcast. While most shows are jam-packed with advertisements, New York City Live! will be broadcast with limited commercial interruptions. There will only be 15-16 minutes of commercials in the 90 minute show, featuring 8-12 performers per episode. These will include singers, musicians, dancers, circus performers, comedians, magicians and a wide variety of other specialty acts. They will also feature an in-house band, The New York City Live! Orchestra. New York City Live! will differ from shows like American Idol or America’s Got Talent in that they will feature only established as well as up and coming professional acts. This is a performance, not a competition.

[caption id="attachment_6114" align="alignleft" width="150" caption="Fred Gefen"][/caption]

The show will be streamed live from The Grand Ballroom in the Manhattan Center at the heart of Midtown, an incredible venue that seats 1,200 people. The Grand Ballroom has hosted fashion shows, concerts, music recordings, trade shows and more. It is 10,000 square feet and has 40 foot ceilings, an unusually large sized space for a show but it’ll be needed to handle the size of the entertainment. Audience members will be granted entry to the show free of charge. The show is geared to appeal to anyone from teens on up. Some of the content may not be appropriate for younger children.

Fred Gefen will be the host of New York City Live! and his co-host will be Ginger Stanley. They are the “new” Fred and Ginger. The host makes you feel so comfortable that when I first met him he told me to sit down and take off my shoes and before I realized he was joking, I was already barefoot. Fred will be the main host but he will not be delivering a formal monologue. Instead, his goal is to introduce the acts and showcase their skills. It’s all about the Talent. Ginger, a drop dead gorgeous actress/model will be assisting in the hosting duties. She will be helping Fred by introducing commercials, doing promotions and being there for whatever else is needed. Fred and Ginger are also hosting another upcoming show called “Not Just Golf.”  It is a lifestyle/travel show geared towards Baby Boomers where each hour-long episode will feature the hosts visiting attractions in world-class vacation spots all around the United States where they will be focusing on, you guessed it, “Not Just Golf.”

Gefen says that he always wanted to put on a variety show like New York City Live! He is a seasoned actor, comic, host and writer. Fred doesn’t get nervous before a performance; he gets excited.  He feels that there is too much misery in the world, so his goal is simply to make people smile.  Fred has performed stand-up comedy at many of the classic clubs in Manhattan. He says he realized that if he can get up in front of an unhappy crowd who are glaring at him and make them laugh, he’s capable of doing anything. When asked who he would most like to have on the show he named a whole slew of performers, but at the top of his list were Tony Bennett and Barbra Streisand. The host is hoping that people will tune in to watch the show live “if for no other reason than to see if I fall off the stage.”

New York City Live! was inspired by a charity organization Gefen founded called Restart A Heart Association. Restart A Heart offers free American Heart Association CPR training and portable Automated External Defibrillators to Community Centers, Houses of Worship and other qualified organizations that couldn’t otherwise afford them. Gefen is also Restart’s Executive Director and has currently earned the title of “World’s Funniest CPR Instructor” and “CPR Man,” a title he actually has on a business card.  Fred decided to create a Variety show so that he could help Restart A Heart fulfill its mission.

[caption id="attachment_6115" align="alignright" width="150" caption="Ginger Stanley"][/caption]

While New York City Live! is already far along in pre-production, the show is more than happy to accept any and all sponsors who appreciate what they’re doing and would like to become involved with the show on a long term basis. They are looking for sponsors that would be interested in investing in the show for at least 6 months in order to allow the production staff to focus their time in making the show the best it can possibly be. Fred says they are looking for sponsors with “a couple of bucks and a lot of vision.” Any interested parties should call (212) 802-7677.

New York City Live! has chosen to use the webcast format over traditional broadcast media because the web is the wave of the future. The host feels that it is no longer necessary to be on “TV” in this day and age.  If a show is good enough, people will find it. The Internet also allows for a huge worldwide audience to have instant access to the show. They will honor the Variety shows of the past but will update the content to incorporate current trends in the entertainment industry. While they will certainly be doing publicity, they are confident that the show’s content will help its popularity spread by word of mouth.

Variety shows are long overdue for a comeback and webcasts are rapidly gaining in popularity. New York City Live! plans on being the first to ride that wave and is hoping to premiere sometime around the spring of 2011. It will air live at NewYorkCityLive.net and will also be available for unlimited replays. The premiere of New York City Live! is an eagerly anticipated event and I suggest you tune in.

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